The common saying “the grass is greener on the other side” is a constant quote running through my head because my neighbor has a beautiful lawn. My lawn, on the other hand, has dry patches, weeds, and random rocks poorly placed. As I read Drawing Heaven into Your Marriage by Dr. Goddard, I was reminded of my poor lawn and my neighbors immaculate one. As I was reading I realized I am not consecrated to my lawn as my neighbor are towards their lawn. I do the minimal amount of work that my house does not disappear while my neighbor goes above and beyond to make sure that their lawn is constantly taken care of.
I relate this to marriage. Many couples put the minimum amount of effort so that it looks decent but it is one missed day of mowing to be over run with weeds. While we put the little effort into our relationship we start looking at other marriages we idealize and dream that our marriage could be like that. We ask ourselves ‘what do they have that we don’t?’ the answer is they are not you!
In Dr. Gottman’s book Seven Principles of Making Marriage Work he talks about how every relationship we bring our own personalities into the marriage. Each marriage is different because it is made up of two uniquely different people. Understanding that there will be difference is important when being consecrated to your marriage. Learning to love them regardless and continuing to give your all to the marriage will turn those differences into opportunities to learn and grow.
I do not care for Justin Bieber but he came out with a song years ago and it is my favorite line in the history of songs. ” But the grass ain’t always greener on the other side, It’s green where you water it “. If you want greener grass you need to water, weed, mow, and other steps to consistently take care of it. You need to be consecrated to your marriage. You need to let your spouse know he is more important than any other relationship.
Marriage Insights 